Friday, November 6, 2009

Blog 7

Wrinkles


What are wrinkles? And why we don’t have wrinkles when we’re young? Well, wrinkle is a crease or fold in the skin. When we’re young we don’t see wrinkles in our skin, it’s because our skin still does a good job of stretching and holding in moisture. As we all know we have three layers in our skin, such as Epidermis as the outermost layer, Dermis as the middle layer, and Subcutaneous as the innermost layer.

When we grow older our epidermal cells become less sticky and thinner and it leads to the dryness in our skin. We lose 10% of our epidermal cells per decade so our skin will takes time to repair itself. Dermis layer also has its own important part in our skin. Dermis is the one that keep our skin look young, because in dermis there is a protein called collagen whose play is to prevent wrinkles. When we get older we will lose the collagen so the dermal layer will get thinner and it will cause trouble of getting enough moisture for the epidermis. The epidermis causes the skin to be sag and wrinkles start to form.

Even though wrinkles are a natural process of aging, it’s not necessary for us to think that we will get wrinkle when we’re old, because there’s chances of us to get wrinkles under our eyes during our 20’s and for some people they probably just notice wrinkles on their skin during their 50’s or 60’s. This is happen because some people take a good care of their skin and some people don’t. For some people they probably have skin’s natural oil and have good genes, meaning their family doesn’t have a lot of wrinkles.

Twins and The Aging of Wrinkles


There is a new study about wrinkles based on identical twins. Researchers gathered almost 200 pairs of twins who attended the annual twin festival in Ohio. Why did they choose twins? It’s because twins are the perfect example of people who has the same genes. It’s like the” genetically programmed” to age the same way. In this study, the researchers reveal some surprising answers about what’s the factor of wrinkles and there is nothing to do with the “pricey” treatments.

Let’s take a closer look at Jeanne and Susan. A pair of identical twins who’s 61 years old but Jeanne looks way younger than Susan. The reasons are, Susan used to smoke a pack and a half of cigarettes per day during her 20’s and she quit smoking on her 30’s, she weighs 15 pounds less than Jeanne, and she moved to Florida when she was 20 years old, so she’s been under the sun a lot more than Jeanne. And for Jeanne, she never smoke and she got less sun exposure. Today according to Jeanne, Susan looks 10 years older than she is now. Bahman Guyuron, a plastic surgeon in Cleveland, and colleagues at Cleveland’s Case Western Reserve University said that “It may seem odd that two people with the same DNA could look so different, but it’s common.” In this case, Susan used to smoke and the longer she smokes the older she looks with more wrinkles and more uneven skin tone. Susan mentioned that she weighs 15 pounds less, and according to Guyuron “for women over 40, additional weight fills in and softens wrinkles, making a heavier twin look younger than her sister.” Susan also lives under the sun and sun exposure could speed up aging with deepens wrinkles and mottles skin, that’s why we should always apply sunscreen to prevent these effects on our skin. So basically, different behaviors could cause differences in people’s appearance.

From this study the researchers found the other factor of wrinkles such as hormones, for women who take hormone- replacement therapy, and birth control pills, the higher the dose is the more likely for women to look younger it’s because estrogen can increase water preservation and make skin smoother. Also alcohol could cause the other twin to look younger than twin who drinks alcohol. Excess alcohol could damage the blood vessels in the skin and it will destroy the quantity and the quality of collagen fibers in dermis layer (the one that make the skin looks young). People who takes anti depress pills will make them look older because anti depress pills will weaken their eye muscle and make eyes look droopy. Surprisingly, divorce could cause people to look older and get more wrinkles. It happens because the level of their stress is higher than people who are married or single.

How To Reduce/Prevent Wrinkles


· Stay away from the sun. Sun is number one cause of wrinkles. Wear sunscreen to prevent wrinkles.
· Going to tanning salon is dangerous for our skin. The UV light is almost the same thing or it can be worse than the sun.
· Don’t smoke. Cigarette destroys the collagen in our skin and it causes wrinkles.
· Don’t drink alcohol. Too much alcohol will destroy our blood vessel in our skin and will damage the collagen fibers.
· Get enough sleep and sleep on your back. If we get enough sleep, our body will produce more hormones and help skin to remain thick and less wrinkle. Also sleeping on the side will increase wrinkles on our face and chin area.
· Don’t squint. Squinting is cause an overwork muscle and it will cause wrinkle under the eyes
· Eat healthy. Fish is good for our skin because they contain protein, and the protein will help reduce wrinkles. Fruits and vegetables will fight the free radicals the one that destroy our cells. They also make skin look younger.
· Use moisturizer and wash your face at the right time. This one is most likely for women. Skin that is moist will look better and less wrinkle. Use more moisturizer during the months when the air is drier. Don’t let the skin get dry. Also don’t wash your face too often because water could wash away the protection that our skin need.
· The most important thing is drink a lot of water. Drink water at least 8 glasses per day.

11 comments:

  1. 1) How well does the author seem to know the reading? Do they use direct quotes, paraphrase, and summaries? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments:
    --->5. I think she has summarised the reasearch well.

    2) Do you see any potential for unintentional plagiarism in this paper as the draft is now or as it is revised? Look for radical changes in style, un-cited data, possible cut-and-paste from the web and etc. None______Possible______Please explain:
    ---> None. Including citations would be great.

    3) How well has the author communicated their opinions on the subject (including clear ideas and sentences)? Did they answer the question clearly and promptly and then follow-through? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments:
    --->5.I think she knows what she is writing and clearly gets her point across.

    4) How well is the essay structured? Does the overall organization make sense? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments:
    --->5.I didn't find any grammatical errors.

    5) Overall, on a scale of 1 to 6, how far along the road to a final draft is this paper? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments:
    ---->5. She is on her way to the final papers.

    What are the main issues this author needs to work on in order to improve this essay (top 3)?:
    ---> She could include more reserach studies and experiments.Also, citing the sources would be a good idea.

    ReplyDelete
  2. 1) How well does the author seem to know the reading? Do they use direct quotes, paraphrase, and summaries? 5) Good. Comments: Really like the quote you added in the twin wrinkle section, I think if you added a quote in the Wrinkle & How to Prevent/Reduce wrinkle section from specialist the piece would be even better.

    2) Do you see any potential for unintentional plagiarism in this paper as the draft is now or as it is revised? Look for radical changes in style, un-cited data, possible cut-and-paste from the web and etc. Somewhat, sounds like you've done a pretty through research and wrote what you've learn. But for the Reduce/Prevent section I would write on where you found the list of preventions and what's been proven to wrote so I doesn't look like a cut and paste.

    3) How well has the author communicated their opinions on the subject (including clear ideas and sentences)? Did they answer the question clearly and promptly and then follow-through? 5) Good. Comments: Your introduction was good, not one to really notice wrinkles but you've managed to pull me in wanting me to read it.

    4) How well is the essay structured? Does the overall organization make sense? 4) OK. Comments: It's ok so far, but it seems like there is more your going to write about not sure.

    5) Overall, on a scale of 1 to 6, how far along the road to a final draft is this paper? Ok-Good, Comments: So far I think it's a really good start for a article, I can see this being printed in magazine devoted to skin care.

    ReplyDelete
  3. How well does the author seem to know the reading? Do they use direct quotes, paraphrase, and summaries? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments:The author sumarized well and made it work to evoke an answer to her question.
    2) Do you see any potential for unintentional plagiarism in this paper as the draft is now or as it is revised? Look for radical changes in style, un-cited data, possible cut-and-paste from the web and etc. None______Possible______Please explain: I do not see any plagiarism in this paper.

    3) How well has the author communicated their opinions on the subject (including clear ideas and sentences)? Did they answer the question clearly and promptly and then follow-through? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments: It is OK and her opinion is weel develop in the introduction. However, needs more explanation

    4) How well is the essay structured? Does the overall organization make sense? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments: Yes it make sense is a good topic a 4 will be given to it.

    5) Overall, on a scale of 1 to 6, how far along the road to a final draft is this paper? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments: I will give the article a 4 OK.

    What are the main issues this author needs to work on in order to improve this essay (top 3)?: More details the article is too short

    ReplyDelete
  4. 1) How well does the author seem to know the reading? Do they use direct quotes, paraphrase, and summaries? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments:4

    2) Do you see any potential for unintentional plagiarism in this paper as the draft is now or as it is revised? Look for radical changes in style, un-cited data, possible cut-and-paste from the web and etc. None______Possible______Please explain:no

    3) How well has the author communicated their opinions on the subject (including clear ideas and sentences)? Did they answer the question clearly and promptly and then follow-through? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments:agree

    4) How well is the essay structured? Does the overall organization make sense? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments:3

    5) Overall, on a scale of 1 to 6, how far along the road to a final draft is this paper? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments: 3

    What are the main issues this author needs to work on in order to improve this essay (top 3)?: leran more about skin

    ReplyDelete
  5. 1) How well does the author seem to know the reading? Do they use direct quotes, paraphrase, and summaries? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments:
    5:Good, Yes, the author has a good grasp of the material. The beginning needs citation, but the rest contains quotes and citation.

    2) Do you see any potential for unintentional plagiarism in this paper as the draft is now or as it is revised? Look for radical changes in style, un-cited data, possible cut-and-paste from the web and etc. None______Possible___X___Please explain:
    It is possible to plagiarise unintentionally due to the information needed on the subject. Just make sure your beginning references where you got the information.

    3) How well has the author communicated their opinions on the subject (including clear ideas and sentences)? Did they answer the question clearly and promptly and then follow-through? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments:
    4:OK, I think it was clear but I didn't get a notion of any opinion from the author.

    4) How well is the essay structured? Does the overall organization make sense? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments:
    5:GOOD, Structured well, yes it makes sense but what are you telling us exactly? Is the article trying to persuade us to protect our skin or is it just information on how skin ages? =)

    5) Overall, on a scale of 1 to 6, how far along the road to a final draft is this paper? 1) Not at all. 2) Barely. 3) Somewhat. 4) OK. 5) Good. 6) Impressive. Comments:
    4:OK, I think you're half way there, just let us know where you are going but this was good stuff.

    What are the main issues this author needs to work on in order to improve this essay (top 3)?:
    1. Cite where you got the information in the beginning.
    2.Know where you want this paper to go, is it information or persuasive.
    3.Add some personal thoughts.
    =)

    ReplyDelete
  6. 1) How well does the author seem to know the reading? Do they usedirect quotes, paraphrase, and summaries? 4) OK.
    Comments:The essay shows clearly understanding of the topic.

    2) Do you see any potential for unintentional plagiarism in this paper as the draft is now or as it is revised? Look for radical changes in style, un-cited data, possible cut-and-paste from the web and etc. None___*___Possible______Please explain: I didn't see any plagiarism.

    3) How well has the author communicated their opinions on the subject (including clear ideas and sentences)? Did they answer the question clearly and promptly and then follow-through? 4) OK.
    Comments:The essay is clear, it goes straigh up to the point. The twins was a good idea to use it as an example in the essay .

    4) How well is the essay structured? Does the overall organization make sense? 4) OK. Comments:The essay is organized and it is easy to understand.

    5) Overall, on a scale of 1 to 6, how far along the road to a final draft is this paper? 1) Not at all. 4) OK.
    What are the main issues this author needs to work on in order to improve this essay (top 3)?:I think that it needs more information, more details.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Most of this material, if not all, needs to be cited properly. A quick Google search turned up the following source for a big chunk of the draft. http://www.nydailynews.com/lifestyle/2009/10/23/2009-10-23_study_of_identical_twins_reveals_how_habits_like_smoking_and_tanning_can_dramati.html

    ReplyDelete
  8. You'll need to cite your work, it appears that Dr.Smith found a huge chunk of your work with a googlee search, and if you don't cite it its plagerism. But the structure was fine and it seems that it can turn out fine.

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  9. Yea, properly cited sources is very importent. Otherwise you should do fine.

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  10. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  11. I like this topic alot..its very interesting. but I can agree with most of the others who responded that you must cite your work. And also I think your introduction could be a bit longer.

    ReplyDelete